Joy to the World… Surviving Holidays and Celebrations

It should be a blessing to get together with family and/or friends during Easter, Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas, New Years, birthdays and other times of celebration.  However, these days and seasons—which should be joyful—can be extremely lonely and emotionally painful times for many people.  As a result, and very sadly, the rate of suicide increases during the holidays. 

Then he said to them, “Go your way, eat the fat, drink the sweet, and send portions to those for whom nothing is prepared; for this day is holy to our Lord. Do not sorrow, for the joy of the LORD is your strength.” 

Nehemiah 8:10 (NKJV)

If you dread the holidays because emotional pain from the past is usually triggered, please know that you are not alone.  This is very common.  However, there is help.  Jesus can release that past pain and trauma!  As Nehemiah 8:10 says, “The joy of the LORD is your strength.”  His joy is not dependent on our circumstances or any past emotional pain we have suffered.  His joy is endless and without comparison.  If we are on a downward spiral into the opposite of His joy, we must draw near to our Heavenly Father and pray for His strength and joy to overshadow the emotional pain. 

My soul melts away for sorrow; strengthen me according to your word!

Psalm 119:28 (ESV)

When emotional pain or trauma from the past is triggered during the holidays, it can be extremely difficult for those who are unknowingly carrying that pain.  They may not realize that their reaction to Aunt Carol or Uncle Harry is really partially the result of past pain that has been buried and is now coming to the surface.  Reactions to what should be happy situations can appear to be inappropriate and even unreasonable to the traumatized person and others, because they do not understand that suppressed pain and trauma are being triggered.

Why are you in despair, O my soul?
And why are you restless and disturbed within me?
Hope in God and wait expectantly for Him, for I shall again praise Him,
The help of my [sad] countenance and my God.

Psalm 43:5 (AMP)

An example of emotional pain from the past being triggered after over six decades was described to me by one of my ministry recipients several years ago.  This woman, Betty (not her real name), had been married for over 50 years when she asked her husband to go to the store to buy a jar of pickles.  Betty told him the type and brand of pickles that she wanted, but when he returned home, he had a jar of generic pickles that was not even the type that she had requested.

This woman, who was in her seventies, said that she went into a rage!  Thankfully, Betty also had some knowledge about inner emotional wounds and quickly realized that her reaction had very little to do with the pickles.  So, she asked the Lord what was going on with her, and He revealed the root of her emotional outburst.  When Betty was a child, her family was very poor and her mother only bought things that were the least expensive.  If her mother came home with anything that was not the cheapest item, this woman’s father got very angry.  The pain and trauma that surfaced when Betty’s husband came home with the generic brand of pickles had been stuffed for over 60 years!  The end of the story is that Betty received the healing and freedom that she needed through Jesus Christ from this past emotional pain and trauma.  Praise the Lord!

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.

Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)

Until inner healing is received, there are several things we can do to minimize experiencing emotional pain during the holidays.  If we know that particular people, or specific situations have caused us emotional pain in the past, we must do whatever we can to limit our contact with them, or completely avoid being exposed to them, if at all possible.   We must set healthy, godly boundaries to protect our hearts and spirits.  Other examples of guarding our hearts include not watching worldly, seasonal programs on television or on other devices, not listening to certain holiday music, and not going to some parties or events, all of which may bring past emotional pain to the surface.  It is much easier to avoid being triggered than to deal with the emotional pain once it has come to the surface.

For unto us a Child is born,
Unto us a Son is given;
And the government will be upon His shoulder.
And His name will be called
Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

Isaiah 9:6 (NKJV)

Focusing on the main reason for the celebration is a must in order to avoid emotional pain and trauma from ruining holidays.  For example, remembering that Christmas is about the birth of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior—and not about the gifts, parties and social events—will help immensely.  We cannot get offended and hurt as easily if we keep the main thing, the main thing.  Jesus’ birth allowed for His death and resurrection which provided all people the opportunity to receive forgiveness for their sins and healing for their broken hearts.  Taking our focus off Aunt Carol or Uncle Harry will help prevent the pain and trauma they trigger from coming up in our hearts and spirits.  Everyone with a broken heart must focus, focus, focus on the Healer and not on the people and situations that caused their heart to be broken.  Creating new, joyful memories helps heal broken hearts as well. 

The LORD is near to the brokenhearted
And saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Psalm 34:18 (NASB)

It takes determination and laser-like focus on our part to be joyful during the holidays. Returning to a place of peace once emotional pain and trauma have produced depression, great sadness, despair or hopelessness in our hearts and spirits is not easy.  However, it is possible through the love and healing power of a genuine, personal relationship with Jesus Christ.  There is never a better time to sincerely ask Jesus to be our personal Lord and Savior than the present moment.  He wants to heal our broken hearts, but He will never force anyone into a relationship with Him.  We must willingly choose to accept that gift, which will make it possible for emotional and spiritual healing to take place.  Once Jesus becomes the true focus of our lives, we can ask Him to release the pain that has surfaced and replace it with His peace and joy.

“The Spirit of the LORD is upon Me,
Because He has anointed Me
To preach the gospel to the poor;
He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted,
To proclaim liberty to the captives
And recovery of sight to the blind,
To set at liberty those who are oppressed;”

Luke 4:18 (NKJV)

God loves His children, followers of Jesus Christ, very much and wants them to be set free from past pain and trauma.  Luke 4:18 are Jesus’ words, proclaiming that He came to heal the brokenhearted.  My prayer for you is that you will make the choice to accept God’s gift of salvation if you have not already done so, and that you will allow the Lord to direct your steps to receive the inner healing you need.  May God bless you with His peace and joy in your hearts, minds and spirits every day and especially during the holidays when we celebrate God’s amazing love and goodness to us.

Kathy Shelton

Seasons of Emotional and Spiritual Healing

Jesus Christ can lead us through seasons of healing from past emotional and spiritual pain and trauma if we will let Him. The Lord never forces anyone to do anything. Our Most High God created us with free wills. It is our choice to enter the inner healing process, or to remain in wounded and broken conditions. Jesus was born, died and rose from the dead to set the captives free and to heal the brokenhearted (Isaiah 61:1, NKJV), but we must choose to receive His freedom and inner healing.

The first step to receiving inner healing is to sincerely ask Jesus to be the Lord and Savior of our lives! Only genuine relationships with Jesus Christ, Father God and the Holy Spirit can provide the emotional and spiritual healing that we need. Our obedience to the Lord and His commandments and instructions is the evidence that we are His children. Obeying God is crucial in the healing process.

The Lord rarely releases all past pain and trauma at one time. The emotional and spiritual healing He provides usually occurs during different seasons of our lives. Seasons of healing can last days, weeks, months, or even years.  Just as in the natural realm, there are longer seasons, shorter seasons and more stormy seasons in the process of emotional and spiritual healing. The important thing is that we enter the inner healing season trusting the Lord to lead us through it. We must have the courage to enter or re-enter the healing process whenever He directs us to do so.

 
 
 
   
Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.
 
Proverbs 3:5-6 (NKJV)
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Sometimes the opportunity to enter a season of healing presents itself spontaneously without us doing anything to initiate it. Emotional pain from the past can be, and often is, triggered and comes up as the result of current painful or traumatic situations. When that happens, we need to trust that the Lord knows the perfect time for healing of an area of emotional pain and trauma and follow His guidance to pursue freedom. We should pray as Jeremiah prayed in Jeremiah 17:14 (NKJV), “Heal me, O LORD, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved, for You are my praise.” However, we also need to realize that the healing of emotional pain and trauma can be a painful process, especially if we have experienced serious emotional trauma over a long period of time.
 
We must enter seasons of healing with this realization that we may experience pain during the process. Just as healing from physical surgery, illnesses, or accidents normally involves pain, healing from emotional and spiritual pain and trauma is a journey that includes good days and some very painful ones. Don’t expect the healing journey to be a piece of cake. However, Jesus promised to be with us always and we can endure the pain of the healing process with Him right by our sides. His incomparable love and peace give us the strength we need to receive inner healing from pain and trauma.
 
If we fell into a cactus plant, and needles were lodged in our bodies, there most certainly would be pain involved in their removal. We are blessed as followers of Jesus that He can apply supernatural anesthesia during the healing process and minimize the pain of the process as He releases the suppressed emotional and spiritual pain and trauma, and heals our hearts and spirits. The healing balm of the Holy Spirit’s presence is the best medicine available for the challenging and ongoing, inner healing process.
 
We must give ourselves time to recover during and between seasons of healing. Our hearts and spirits cannot endure non-stop emotional and spiritual surgery any more than our physical bodies could survive numerous physical surgeries without resting and recovery time between surgeries. Rest is another important aspect of the inner healing process.
 
Also, it is more difficult to receive inner healing from past pain and trauma if we are experiencing current stress and trauma. That hinders the healing process just as an underlying illness can hinder healing and recovery from physical surgery. Therefore, we must do whatever we can to reduce or eliminate ongoing stress and trauma to receive the most effective, godly inner healing possible.
 
The end result of going through seasons of inner healing is worth whatever the journey may require. Healing for emotional and spiritual pain and trauma usually requires more than prayer from a family member or friend. We must be diligent and wise in seeking help from trained, Christian counselors or prayer ministers if necessary. We must also always give God praise and thanks for the freedom and healing He provides every step of the way. Thankfulness increases joy and they are both essential in the healing process.
 
 
 
 
I will praise You, O LORD,
with my whole heart;
I will tell of all Your marvelous works.
 
Psalm 9:1 (NKJV)

 

 
 
Another very important aspect of completing the journey through seasons of healing is waiting with hope. When we see a rose bud that has not yet opened, we wait with hope that it will someday become a beautiful flower. Waiting on the Lord and His perfect timing for the seasons of healing in our lives to be accomplished brings freedom in and of itself. It brings freedom from fear and hopelessness.
 
 
 
I would have lost heart,
unless I had believed
That I would see the goodness
of the LORD
In the land of the living.
Wait on the LORD;
Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the LORD!
 
Psalm 27:13-14 (NKJV)
 
 
 

 
 
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil,
to give you a future and a hope.
 
Jeremiah 29:11 (NKJV) 
 
 
 
 
 
My prayer for you is that you will face emotional and spiritual pain and trauma as the Lord leads you into your seasons of healing, and that Jesus will release that pain and trauma so that you can blossom into all He has planned for your life.
 
 
Kathy Shelton
 
 
 

 

What did THEY just say?

Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it and indulge it will eat its fruit and bear the consequences of their words.

Proverbs 18:21 (Amplified Bible)

If you have not already done so, please read the article titled, “What did you just say,” before reading this one (CLICK HERE). That article explains the basics of the power of the tongue and word curses.

Quite often, doctors and other medical professionals unknowingly say things to their patients that are word curses. They do not realize what they are doing. They do it because that is what they’ve been taught. Give the patient a diagnosis. Give the patient a prognosis. A prognosis is simply a prediction of future events based on the diagnosis. However, only God knows the future! Many of those diagnoses and prognoses are taken to heart by patients, and their conditions can worsen rapidly as a result of the word curses spoken over them.

Several people I have known, who were diagnosed with cancer, are examples of this principle. They were told by their doctors that they only had a short time to live. Within weeks, they were dead. They lost all hope as a result of the words spoken to them. Their hearts and spirits were broken.

A merry heart does good, like medicine, But a broken spirit dries the bones.

Proverbs 17:22 (NKJV)

In comparison, one Christian lady was diagnosed with brain cancer and told she only had a few months to live. She was a fighter and did not accept that prognosis. She did not accept the word curses spoken over her life. That godly woman survived for several decades defying the doctor’s prognosis.  Her attitude, faith and trust in God truly affected the longevity of her life. Sincerely following Jesus Christ was her passion and He extended her life far beyond what the doctors had predicted. Our attitude can make all the difference.

Doctors have decided that certain diseases and illnesses are incurable. They have told patients that. I was one of them. I was diagnosed in 1990 with a condition called biliary dyskinesia. The symptoms are extreme abdominal pain similar to a gallbladder attack where a gallstone is stuck in the bile duct. However, my gallbladder had been removed years before these attacks began. For over a year after the diagnosis, the doctors did everything they could, including several experimental procedures, but the attacks increased and the pain was excruciating. Eventually, I was told by one doctor that there was no cure and I would have to live with the condition for the rest of my life, taking very strong narcotic medication for the pain.

Many times, medication just masks the symptoms and does not cure the problem or disease. Our Heavenly Father is the Great Physician. He is more than able to cure any disease. Since I was only thirty-seven years old, the thought of living like that for the rest of my life was not something I was willing to accept. That prognosis did not take into account the amazing, miracle-working power of our Most High God who supernaturally healed me of that disease through prayer soon after the doctors gave up. Praise God!

Before I continue, I want to make something very clear. There are definitely times when medical procedures and medications are necessary to assist our bodies in the healing process. However, our Most High God enables them to work to restore our health and ability to function. I am not saying that doctors or medical professionals are wrong when they suggest treatments, but that we must be careful what we allow ourselves to accept as inevitable. The Lord may have a different outcome in His plan.

“For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,” says the Lord.

Isaiah 55:8 (NKJV)

Another group of professionals that often speak word curses over their patients are mental health professionals. They diagnose people as this or that. As they speak the diagnoses over the patients, they may be breaking their hearts and spirits more than they were already broken when they came to them for help. They are putting labels on the patients that make it even harder for them to get well, to be healed, and to be set free. Our Most High God is much bigger than any label that has been assigned to someone. He can heal a person regardless of what diagnosis and prognosis they have been given.

In Mark 5:1-20, the Bible gives the account of the man who was bound with chains because no one could tame him. He was cutting himself with stones. He was literally out of his mind. Today, he would certainly be given a diagnosis by mental health doctors. However, Jesus restored the man to his right mind by casting out unclean spirits. Jesus did not put a label on the man. He did not prescribe drugs for him to take. He compassionately set him free from what was tormenting his mind.  There are many people these days who have been diagnosed as mentally ill—who are suffering from broken heart issues and spiritual oppression. If they could receive the love and healing of Jesus Christ, they may not need the mind-altering medications that have been prescribed for them.

After they received the inner healing they needed for past emotional pain and trauma, some ladies to whom I ministered no longer required medication for depression. One of those ladies had been given an antidepressant drug a few months before she came to me for prayer. After Jesus ministered to her broken heart during several prayer sessions, she decided on her own to tell her doctor that she did not think she needed the medication any longer. He then helped her get weaned off the medication. (I have never told anyone to stop taking medication, but to talk to their doctor about medical decisions!) After that lady received inner healing prayer and had completely discontinued the antidepressant, she still experienced painful and traumatic life circumstances, but she did not feel the need for medication. She said that she was able to function much better overall and deal with the trials with Jesus’ help.  

People working in the criminal justice system are another example of professionals who may speak word curses over individuals. In the prisons, people with a history of criminal activity may be suffering from mental illness and severely broken hearts, but they may be told that they will always be criminals and never be able to stay out of prison. They may even hear that from their own family members or be told, “You are no good,” or “You are a bad apple.” Those are powerful word curses. They can make the difference between life and death.

The diagnoses and prognoses that I described above can take away hope. They do not give hope. The devil wants to destroy hope. We must not let him! We must look to our Most High God and His Son, Jesus, for our hope.

“… Christ in you, the hope of glory.”

Colossians 1:27 (NKJV)

The bottom line is this. Do not accept things that are spoken over you by anyone as always being truth and the end of the discussion.  Whether it is a doctor or mental health professional giving you a diagnosis or a prognosis, or a teacher, family member, or others speaking words over you, be careful what you accept as truth. Embrace the Bible. Embrace what the Word of God says about you! Embrace the fact that God loves you more than you can imagine and that He wants the best for His children.

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

Jeremiah 29:11 (NKJV) 

We should give God much more credit than we do! We need to give the enemy, the devil, much less credit. We need to stop agreeing with the devil and the kingdom of darkness by speaking word curses over ourselves and other people.

Genuine Christians need to speak God’s promises out loud on a regular basis in spite of how things look in the natural realm. We must believe God and His Word, pray, and leave the rest in our Heavenly Father’s hands. God’s Word is full of encouraging promises for His children. They include the following verses.

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.

Philippians 4:6-8 (NKJV)

So prepare your minds for action, be completely sober [in spirit—steadfast, self-disciplined, spiritually and morally alert], fix your hope completely on the grace [of God] that is coming to you when Jesus Christ is revealed.

1 Peter 1:13 (Amplified Bible)

For “who has known the mind of the Lord that he may instruct Him?” But we have the mind of Christ.

1 Corinthians 2:16 (NKJV)

For as many as are the promises of God, in Christ they are [all answered] “Yes.” So through Him we say our “Amen” to the glory of God.

2 Corinthians 1:20 (Amplified Bible)

who Himself bore our sins in His own body on the tree, that we, having died to sins, might live for righteousness—by whose stripes you were healed.

1 Peter 2:24 (NKJV)

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

 Romans 8:28 (NKJV)

Kathy Shelton

The Importance of Godly Relationships

The Importance of Supportive, Godly Relationships While Going Through and Healing from Trauma

Supportive, godly relationships are critical as we go through and heal from traumatic situations. Traumatic situations include the death of loved ones, serious illnesses, physical abuse, sexual abuse, spiritual abuse, emotional abuse, mental abuse, verbal abuse, rape, domestic violence, being the victim of a crime, divorce, accidents, devastating financial conditions and natural disasters. Those extremely painful circumstances can leave us feeling alone, abandoned, rejected, depressed, hopeless, betrayed and even suicidal at times. Negative and harmful emotional responses are often initiated or exacerbated by the lies of the devil. He always tries to discourage God’s children and lead them into a pit of despair when they are weakened by traumatic situations.

We live in a world full of pain and trauma and there is no way to avoid it. However, our Most High God provided ways for us to not just survive, but to more easily go through and heal from the effects of trauma. We must be diligent in staying connected to God and genuine Christians in order to avoid the traps of the devil that occur if we isolate ourselves due to one-time or ongoing traumatic events.

The eternal God is your refuge,
And underneath are the everlasting arms;

Deuteronomy 33:27 (NKJV)

 

A father of the fatherless and a judge and protector of the widows,
Is God in His holy habitation.

Psalm 68:5 (AMP)

The most important relationships that our Father God wants us to turn to when we experience and need healing from traumatic events are our relationships with Him, Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit. Our Most High God wants to comfort us and lead us on the paths that will help us. He wants to heal our broken hearts and spirits that have been devastated by traumatic situations. However, we must sincerely accept God’s love and His Son, Jesus, as our personal Lord and Savior, to be able to receive His incomparable comfort and healing. 

Jesus said to him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.”

John 14:6 (NKJV)

Jesus also said,

 Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 

Matthew 11:28 (NKJV)

Therefore, the first relationships that we should always rely on for comfort and healing are those with Father God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. They are the most important relationships we can ever experience on this journey that we call life. Supportive, godly relationships with other people are also essential for us to continue to be comforted during, and heal after, emotionally traumatic situations. The Lord knows our need for godly counsel, prayer and support, especially when we are weary and vulnerable to the lies of the enemy.

We all need a listening ear and a kind word from a godly person to lift our spirits when we are drained as the result of emotional and spiritual pain. He will surround us with people who love us and care deeply about our pain, but they may be people other than family members. The family was created to provide that kind of comfort and support. However, we do not live in a perfect world and our own family members may be the cause of some of the emotional pain and trauma that we suffer. Feelings of rejection, betrayal and abandonment can become intensely painful when trauma is caused by our loved ones. Loneliness and a feeling of isolation are lessened when we reach out to genuine Christians.

God makes a home for the lonely;
He leads the prisoners into prosperity,
Only the stubborn and rebellious dwell in a parched land.

Psalm 68:6 (AMP)

Traumatic circumstances always break our hearts. People often carry emotional pain for years and decades without even realizing that suppressed pain and trauma are affecting them in significant areas of their lives. We were never meant to go through pain and trauma alone. Isolating ourselves during those circumstances is the worst thing we can do and only adds to the pain. That is why we must receive love and kindness from people who are living according to God’s Word—whom we can trust with our broken hearts—not in place of the Lord, but in addition to Him. 

We must reach out to godly friends, family, healing ministers and others who can provide prayer, encouragement and the love that we need for the healing process to be accomplished. Our Most High God created us to be in close relationship with Him and godly people. Cutting ourselves off from those relationships makes us incredibly susceptible to destructive feelings and to attacks from the devil. Fear of being hurt again can also cause us to be hesitant to reach out to people for help. However, The Lord will show us who can be trusted and through whom He wants us to receive His comfort and healing. We must receive God’s provision of healing for our broken hearts through His Son, Jesus, and the godly relationships with which He blesses us.

Jesus said,

The Spirit of the Lord is upon Me,
Because He has anointed Me
To preach the gospel to the poor;
He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted,
To proclaim liberty to the captives
And recovery of sight to the blind,
To set at liberty those who are oppressed;

Luke 4:18 (NKJV)

Jesus came to not only save us from our sins, but also to heal our broken hearts! A genuine, personal relationship with Him is essential in receiving comfort and healing during and after times of emotional pain and trauma. Our heavenly Father also blesses us with His love and peace through supportive, godly relationships with people who know how to listen and be compassionate when we are in emotional pain. Keeping emotional pain stuffed inside only makes things worse. We must let go of our pride, reach out to the Lord Jesus and His sincere followers, and allow them to help us.  

 

Kathy Shelton

 

 

The Tragedy of Suicide

The tragedy of suicide, taking one’s own life, occurs throughout the world. It is not limited to any age, gender, religion, or ethnic group, although the suicide rate is higher in some countries.

The World Health Organization estimates that approximately 800,000 people die from suicide each year, or one death every 40 seconds. There are indications that for each adult who died by suicide there may have been more than 20 others who attempted suicide. In 2019, the countries with the top 5 rates of suicide were Lithuania, Russia, Guyana, South Korea and Belarus. Nearly 30% of all suicides worldwide occur in India and China. Youth suicide is increasing at the greatest rate and young people are now the group at highest risk in a third of all countries.

The incidence of suicide is at an epidemic level in the United States. According to one news report in November 2018, the U.S. suicide rate was at a 50-year high! The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, AFSP, reports that suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the United States. More people die—on average 132 per day—as a result of suicide than car accidents in the U.S. That is over 48,000 deaths due to suicide in the U.S. per year.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) in the U.S. reports that suicide is the #2 cause of death for people between the ages of 10 and 34. In addition, there were approximately 1,400,000 Americans who attempted suicide in 2017. Women attempt suicide 1.4 times more often than men, but men die as the result of suicide 3.5 times more often than women. Physicians have been reported to have a higher rate of suicide—twice as high—than any other profession.

Veterans in the U.S. have been taking their own lives at the rate of at least 20 per day. More than 6,000 veterans die by suicide annually. Active-duty, U.S. military suicides were at a record high in 2018 with a total of 321, including Marines, sailors, airmen and soldiers.  That was the highest number of suicides among active-duty personnel in at least 6 years.

All for Jesus Ministries is based in New Mexico in the United States. According to this New Mexico website:

https://nmhealth.org/publication/view/help/1832/,

New Mexico’s rate of suicide has consistently been more than 50% higher than the U.S. rate. Sadly, New Mexico had the fourth highest suicide rate in the U.S. in 2016. One suicide every 19 hours—more than one per day—occurs in New Mexico. Approximately 491 people died by suicide in New Mexico in 2017. That is more than deaths resulting from breast cancer or people driving under the influence of alcohol or drugs.

The above statistics do not take into account that, due to shame or disgrace, suicide is generally underreported.  Attempting suicide, or actually committing suicide, is usually the result of unbearable emotional, mental, spiritual or physical pain and trauma. Trauma includes the death of a loved one, divorce, any type of abuse, rape, being subjected to war or terrorism, a homicidal attempt on one’s life, domestic violence, serious accidents and natural disasters. The debilitating symptoms of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) can lead to suicide.

For we do not want you to be ignorant, brethren, of our trouble which came to us in Asia: that we were burdened beyond measure, above strength, so that we despaired even of life.

2 Corinthians 1:8 (NKJV)

Paul wrote about despairing even of life in 2 Corinthians 1:8. According to 2 Corinthians 11:23-28, Paul had gone through unimaginable trials, including beatings with rods, whippings with thirty-nine lashes five times, perils everywhere he went, surviving a ship wreck, sleeplessness, hunger and thirst, being stoned, and being thrown into prison. He endured those things without losing hope, yet in the province of Asia, something burdened him beyond measure and above strength, causing him and his companions to despair of life itself. However, they did not commit suicide, but trusted in God to deliver them. Paul said that the prayers of others brought them through their season of hopelessness.

A broken heart is often the starting point for suicidal thoughts. The person who attempts or commits suicide has lost hope that the pain will stop any other way. The enemy of our souls, the devil, adds to that hopelessness by agreeing with the person that suicide is the answer. A demonic spirit of suicide may be attached to the pain, and the combination can be deadly. When someone commits suicide, they escape the pain and trauma, but their loved ones and friends are left with devastating pain and trauma as a result and their hearts are broken into hundreds of pieces.

Suicide is a tragedy that can often be prevented. How? First and foremost, the person needs to sincerely ask Jesus Christ to come into their life and be their personal Lord and Savior. That does not automatically mean that all the pain and suicidal thoughts will instantly disappear, although that can happen. In fact, people who are followers of Jesus Christ are not unaffected by the devastation or the finality of the act of suicide, but they have the opportunity to receive healing and freedom from emotional and spiritual pain. Jesus is the Way, the Truth, and the Life (John 14:6). Healing and freedom are possible through Jesus Christ!

Feeling alone and isolating oneself from others only increases the emotional pain. During the coronavirus pandemic, Covid-19, people have been more isolated than ever in an attempt to control the spread of the virus. Loneliness and depression can result, but do not have to lead to suicide.

Before the pain gets to the point where someone gives up and attempts to take his or her own life, they need to talk to someone. Talking about the pain and trauma can be very comforting and it can release some of the pressure. If necessary to avoid an irreversible act of suicide, they should seek help from a trained crisis counselor or a qualified Christian counselor or minister. Not all Christian counselors or ministers understand the enormous spiritual dynamics involved in the hopelessness that leads to suicide. However, there is help available for those who are despairing of life itself.

There are things that we can do to counteract the isolation and loneliness during Covid-19. As followers of Jesus Christ, we must put His teachings into practice. Spending dedicated time with the Lord in prayer is an essential part of fighting loneliness and depression. Reading God’s Word, the Bible, out loud and listening to praise and worship music are also extremely important. We must also control what we allow ourselves to see and hear. Turning off and/or not reading negative and upsetting news stories, commentaries, emails and text messages protects our hearts, minds and spirits from further trauma. These are very traumatic times and even the most devoted Christians can be knocked off balance if they are not careful to focus on the Lord and His goodness.

Life is a precious gift from our Most High God and He wants us to live out our destinies as His children and followers of His Son, Jesus.  Satan wants to steal our life purposes, to kill us, and to destroy God’s plans for our lives.  However, Jesus came so that we could have abundant life as He said in John 10:10.

The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.

John 10:10 (NKJV)

Since we are prayer ministers, not counselors or mental health professionals, we always recommend that anyone with severe emotional symptoms seek out the help of medical doctors and trained Christian counselors in their local area and country.

In the event of an emergency situation for someone who is contemplating suicide in the United States, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at (800) 273-8255, or contact the Crisis text line by texting “TALK” to 741741.

We do not suggest that we know and understand all of the aspects of mental illness, especially the effects of mind-altering drugs and prescription medications. However, we have observed that emotional pain is often accompanied by spiritual considerations that need to be addressed in the spiritual realm through prayer. Biblical inner healing prayer may help someone who has experienced suicidal thoughts, depending on the individual’s specific circumstances. When Jesus releases past pain and trauma through prayer, it also often results in the removal of suicidal tendencies. Praise the Lord!

Jesus Christ came to fulfill the Scriptures in Isaiah 61:1-3, including the following:

“…to give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning,
the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness;

Isaiah 61:3 (NKJV)

Jesus wants us to live in His joy!
Kathy Shelton

 

One More Time—Falling and Getting Back Up

Do you feel like a failure? Are you brokenhearted? Have you struggled with the same behaviors or addiction for years without victory? Have you felt like giving up? Don’t! It takes courage to get back up when we fall. Be courageous and the Lord will strengthen your heart.

Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart,
All you who hope in the Lord.

Psalm 31:24 (NKJV)

If you have sincerely asked Jesus Christ to be your personal Lord and Savior, then you can hope in the Lord. We all occasionally miss the mark of perfectly following and obeying the Lord. However, practicing known sin on a regular or daily basis is not missing the mark. That is rebellion and willful disobedience to God.

If we say that we have fellowship with Him, and walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

1 John 1:6-9 (NKJV)

Our faithful God will forgive a repentant person who is genuinely sorry for their sins and makes the choice to change their behavior. God is ready to forgive.

For You, Lord, are good, and ready to forgive,
And abundant in mercy to all those who call upon You.

Psalm 86:5 (NKJV)

Father God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit are good! However, no person is good all the time—no one. Human beings have all sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). Falling short of the glory of God does not make us hopeless cases. It means that we are human.

Just because you have failed once, twice or even hundreds of times, that does not mean that you cannot succeed. A friend of mine once told me that a high-ranking officer in the military shared with him that he would rather have someone under his command who had fallen and gotten back up than someone who had never fallen at all. He knew that the one who had fallen and gotten back up would not easily succumb to defeat. The person who has failed at receiving healing from past pain and trauma, but continues to pursue their freedom is very likely to eventually be victorious. Do not lose heart!

And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.

Galatians 6:9 (NKJV)

The enemy of our souls, Satan, encourages genuine Christians to feel defeated and discouraged. If we allow him to accomplish that in our lives, he has won the battle. However, he does not win the war! The Bible makes it clear that Satan and his forces will be completely defeated in the end. We must hold on to that truth as we fight the good fight of faith.

Fight the good fight of faith, lay hold on eternal life, to which you were also called and have confessed the good confession in the presence of many witnesses. 

1 Timothy 6:12 (NKJV)

Regardless of what you are facing today, do not give in to the temptation to give up! Yes, there are horrible storms that come into our lives. Those situations can cause us a lot of emotional, spiritual and/or physical pain, and trauma, but our victory is found in overcoming through the Lord Jesus Christ.

What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things? Who shall bring a charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies.  Who is he who condemns? It is Christ who died, and furthermore is also risen, who is even at the right hand of God, who also makes intercession for us.  Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?  As it is written:

“For Your sake we are killed all day long;
We are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.”

Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:31-39 (NKJV)

We are more than conquerors through Jesus Christ!

Do not give up! If you have fallen again, get back up one more time and fight for your victory. You will succeed with the Lord Jesus Christ by your side. Take His hand and let Him lead you into freedom. He loves you and wants that for you more than you can imagine. I have witnessed Jesus Christ set hundreds of people free from past pain and trauma. He can do the same for you!

Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Romans 15:13 (NKJV)

For suggestions regarding how to receive help, check out our HELPFUL RESOURCES page. Your freedom from sin, addiction, and past pain and trauma is worth fighting for. Be filled with hope today!

Kathy Shelton

WAITING in the Midst of Pain and Trauma

WAITING?!? Most of us, especially those with broken hearts, have a very difficult time waiting for anything. We have become a society of instant everything. We want it now, whatever it may be. However, the Most High God often tells us to wait on His perfect timing for the answers to our prayers. We may never understand why the Lord requires us to wait for so many things, but we must trust that He knows what is best for our lives and what will possibly cause us harm if we receive answers to our prayers too soon. Trusting the Lord makes it easier to wait on Him.

I would have lost heart, unless I had believed
That I would see the goodness of the Lord
In the land of the living.

Wait on the Lord;
Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the Lord!

 Psalm 27:13-14 (NKJV)

Many people lose heart because they do not believe that they will ever see their situations improve. The pain and trauma they carry can become unbearable and may even lead to suicidal thoughts. The enemy can bring discouragement our way through numerous methods. One of those is when he whispers the lie to us, “God does not care about you. He would not have allowed this terrible thing to happen if He did.” If we listen to the devil and his lies, our faith will be weakened, our hearts can become more troubled, and deep depression can set in.  

What does the goodness of the Lord mean? Some people are under the impression that it means their lives will be pain-free and problem-free. However, the Lord never promised that our lives would be easy. The goodness of the Lord is not based on our circumstances. The Lord is always good! His goodness can be seen all around us, but we must look for it through eyes of faith. Looking through eyes of despair and depression hinders us from seeing the goodness of the Lord. 

Our prayers to see God’s goodness in certain situations may be delayed for various reasons, but we need to continue to have faith that He is working on our behalf. Psalm 27:14 says, “Wait on the Lord; be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart; wait, I say, on the Lord!” We must allow the Lord to strengthen our broken hearts by standing firm in our faith.

But if we hope for what we do not see, we eagerly wait for it with perseverance.

 Romans 8:25 (NKJV)

Saying that waiting is difficult is an understatement. How many of us eagerly wait with perseverance? The Lord may require us to wait for answers to our prayers for emotional, physical or spiritual healing for days, months, years, or even decades. However, God’s plans for us are always good, and in the midst of our times of waiting, He will strengthen us and draw us into deeper relationships with Him, Jesus and the Holy Spirit if we allow Him to do so. Our heart attitudes must be that—regardless of our circumstances, pain, trauma, or our lack of understanding why—we will trust our heavenly Father completely. He is the Most High God, the Lord of Hosts, and the Creator of the Universe. We must remember that He is never surprised by our situations and suffering, and that He loves us with an everlasting love (Jeremiah 31:3)!

The Lord did not immediately deliver numerous people written about in the Bible from their problems and traumatic situations. Many of them had to wait for years or decades before they saw the answers to their prayers. Noah, Abraham, Joseph, the Apostles and many others had to wait on the Lord before they saw God’s promises fulfilled.  However, while they were waiting, they served the Lord! In obedience to the Most High God, while Noah was waiting for God’s deliverance from the immense evil on the earth, Noah built an ark even though there had not been any rain. Joseph went through horrible circumstances, but he kept his eyes on the big picture—the Lord’s will for his life during each season regardless of the pain and trauma he endured. Paul did the same. We must also keep our eyes on the big picture. Having to wait is not unusual, nor is it punishment for anything we have done. It is just a fact of life.

As we are suffering unspeakable trauma, we often pray for Almighty God to intervene and relieve the emotional and spiritual pain that has cut us to the core of our beings. We may ask the Lord why we have not received answers to our prayers and the prayers of others, and why the suffering has continued in spite of them. Wanting immediate answers to our prayers is a dangerous attitude, because the devil can take advantage of that and lead us to doubt and be discouraged when answers are delayed.

Spiritual warfare can also be a reason that we have to wait for answers to our prayers. According to Daniel 10:12-13, the answers to Daniel’s prayers were hindered and delayed for 21 days.  There was a very real battle taking place in the spiritual realm over Daniel’s prayers and the answers to them. Our Most High God heard those prayers as soon as Daniel prayed them, but the prince of the kingdom of Persia battled against the answers, delaying them from being delivered.

Spiritual warfare is more real than anything we can see in the natural realm. We must understand that our broken hearts are often the result of attacks from the kingdom of darkness, either directly or through human beings. Continuing to pray and ask Almighty God for help is crucial as we fight against demonic and evil entities. The blood that Jesus Christ shed on the cross is more powerful than anything the devil, or his helpers, can do to us. As we remember to stay focused and wait on the Lord, we will see the answers to our prayers and healing for our broken hearts and spirits!

But those who wait on the Lord
Shall renew their strength;
They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
They shall run and not be weary,
They shall walk and not faint.

Isaiah 40:31 (NKJV)

As we wait on the Lord in the midst of pain and trauma, our emotional, mental, spiritual and physical strength can be depleted. That is why we must make a point to continue to fill ourselves with the joy of the Lord to renew our strength. Actions that we can take include listening to praise and worship music, singing out loud to the Lord, reading the Bible out loud, praying with others and meditating on God’s goodness. The joy of the Lord is our strength (Nehemiah 8:10) at all times and in every traumatic circumstance while we are waiting on the Lord!

Kathy Shelton